Pain/Hope

Hi All,
I know its been a long time since my last post. But the blame rests on a silly project and my mad boss. All's well now ..... the silly project's over and my boss has gone crazy.

Enjoy the new post.

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Lying on my bed, staring at the dark ceiling,
I pray for the pain to subside; any healing.
The heart beats so hard, I wish it to explode,
the burden so huge, my chest heaves with the load.

The pain shook me out of my wonderland,
my castle vanquished, as if it were of sand.
I pass through the low of the "what if" phase,
onto the anger of "why not", in a state of craze.

The pain engulfs; follows me like my own shadow.
How I wish I could discard it out of the window.
The grief wants me to believe in divine intervention;
almost hoping that joy was His ultimate intention.

The pinch, now and then, makes me feel alive.
An energy source, on which my heart can thrive.
It now resides in me, shares my soul; a brother.
It makes me think; view it as a lesson rather.

The lessons, the wisdom that comes along with it,
is priceless; more than one would like to admit.
The buzz persists; I raise my head and look around.
Wonder, who smiles and who isn't under the pound.

Each battles within, defeated by their own ghost;
with a complete profile of pain and loss to boast.
Wait! Is this true? Why does everyone look akin?
Or does the picture reflect the turmoil within.

The voice whispers a few words into my ear;
not to turn around, not to shed a tear.
I open the distressing bottle of red wine,
spill it away; better than spilling brine.

Now, I am in search of the sign of new hope,
rested and ready, to rise up the uneven slope.
The fear of failure, of slipping comes to mind.
But that's where the delight lies; I remind.

The hope transports me back to wonderland,
my castle restored; each grain, each strand.
I pass through the high of the "to be" phase,
onto the surge of "I do", in a state of craze.

Lying on my bed, staring at the bright ceiling,
I pray for the joy to inundate; divine feeling.
The heart beats so hard, I wish it to explode,
scatter the love to wherever my blood flowed.